Patrick's Rants


No Need for Caffeine

Filed under: A****** drivers — site admin @ 9:47 am

I was sitting at the traffic light on Milton and S Plaza way. As I started to pull away when the light turned green I noticed the woman in the blue mini van behind me acting a bit animated. I couldn’t tell if she was talking on a cell phone or whatever. In my distraction at her animated state – and the fact that she might as well have tied her bumper to mine as close as she was – I was going under the speed limit: 30 vs. 35. No matter, I was nearing my destination and flicked the turn signal for turning right into the Starbucks (collecting coffee grounds for the fledgling compost pile). She really started to go off, flailing her head around, looking very pissed off. I noticed that she slid into the turn lane behind me and as I completed my turn into the parking lot I saw her right turn signal was on. She – it seems to me – was livid that I turned in in front of her, as if I deliberately slowed her down by the one to two seconds the 100 feet at 30 mph cost her; as if I saw her turn signal and flipped mine on, just to make her mad.

Had I thought about it, I would have walked into the Starbucks right in front of her – and paid for her coffee. That would have really pissed her off I’m sure.

I have some suggestions for the wild haired woman:

  • If you are running so late that 5mph over 100 feet makes that much of a difference in your life, skip the coffee
  • If you weren’t on my ass over that 100 feet, I could have seen your turn signal – and maybe just skipped Starbucks this morning (as it turns out, there were no used grounds this morning, I very well could have skipped it)
  • If such a little thing makes you so angry, you don’t need caffeine to amp you up, switch to decaf
  • Road rage ain’t just a video game, the next person you ride like that might not be so laid back

As an aside, driving like that isn’t good for your brakes, your insurance rates and you could have gotten a ticket for following too closely.

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